It's been a bad week for air travelers in America. Could it get any worse you ask? Oh yes my friends, much, much worse. A few days ago, US Airways, possibly the worst of the bunch, announced that they will start charging $2 for all non-alcoholic drinks. So on top of crappy service, long delays, uncomfortable seating, we now have to make sure we don't spend all our singles at the local strip club before we get on the plane (a real issue for G Luxe Crewmember Tandori). What bewilders me is why these airlines don't just increase the ticket price by five bucks and do away with the line item pricing. It would be less insulting, and if a passenger is going to make a go or no go decision based on five freaking dollars, do you really want him or her as a customer anyways?
Yesterday, Jet Blue, the former darling of the US airline industry got in the Blue Light Special game by announcing that they will start charging $7 for a blanket and pillow kit. Honestly, if they're going to nickel and dime us with all these fees, why not offer us something we really want. I propose we legalize prostitution for all non-terrestrial locations, i.e. airplanes (and I guess ships would count too), and allow these airlines to charge for "adult services". Charge $100 for a quick handy and $200 for a BJ. Full blown intercourse or lap dances just wouldn't be practical with the limited space so those activities would be off limits. I tell you, the airline industry could literally screw themselves out of their financial malaise.
If you think our idea is a good one, why not forward this post to our friends at Jet Blue and US Airways.
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